Dear America

Dear America,
I know that things haven’t been the greatest between us lately and I know we can sometimes be a pain in the ass, but I want you to know that we love you. We know that you’re our bigger stronger brother who would kick anybody’s ass who was stupid enough to fuck with us. You laugh when we make our own decisions and let us feel as if we’re walking all on our own, but we know that you are the safety net behind us to catch us if we fall.

You have more cash, more people, a bigger stronger army, and better TV than we could ever hope for. If it wasn’t for you we’d be sitting here watching Degrassi High and Trailer Park Boys all day every day. Actually, TPB rocks… but you get my point! We’d be trading with countries that I can’t even pronounce their names, our (funny) money wouldn’t be worth nearly as much as it is, and our sense of fashion… well, let’s just not go there because it wouldn’t be pretty!

You are the only one with balls and generosity who is capable of exercising them at the same time. You go out of your way to help people only to be criticized, hated, or even targetted by ungrateful pricks who don’t appreciate anything you do. You always get put down for being a bully, but people continually fail to recognize your sensitive side. Sure you’ve made some mistakes (haven’t we all), but ultimately you just want people to be happy and peaceful and democratic… What’s wrong with that?!

So since we never say it… THANK YOU for everything! Don’t worry, we will grow up one day and make you proud, but until then, thanks for watching our back!

Much Love
Your annoying little brother Canada
xoxo

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15 thoughts on “Dear America

  1. U.K. gets my utmost respect and love… Just from further away! I have to love them more though since I am from Wales!! And… because the SAS kick ass!

  2. Nick – Canadians don’t cook… but we do drink lots of beer! If you drink enough beer though, it can be just as filling as a meal.

    Kaysea – Thanks… I thought it needed to be said.

  3. I appreciate the shout out, but I don’t feel the same way about my country. We are like one of those guys who had and has a lot of potential but is using it all for the wrong reasons. Watch the “The Torture Question” on PBS Frontline. It is clear that a nation as great and powerful as the U.S., one built on a sense of justice and equality, would sink so low as to sanction wholesale torture.

    When people complain when U.S. policies are compared with Nazis, they ignore history. The U.S. and South American countries helped Nazi war criminals escape to South America. A short time later, the generals of the South
    american countries orchestrated juntas in most of the countries down there. The Nazis encouraged these actions and tought them how to torture efficiently.

    Also present and helping these South American monsters were the CIA and U.S. military intelligence. The CIA and MI were there as much to learn (that which the South Americans learned from the Nazis) as to get intelligence or assist in interregations.

    During the Dirty War, thousands of people were murdered (disapeared) by the juntas with advice and consent of the U.S. The U.S., including John Negroponte, the present Director of National Intellegence, knew of and consented to the murders of American citizens, most notably Jesuit priests.

    Now the torture techniques that the CIA and MI learned from the South and Central Americans, who learned them from the Nazis are using them in Iraq, Afganistan, GITMO and other secret locations.

    This is not the America I love. This is not the America I served in uniform for most of my adult life. I am ashamed of the America we have become.

    We are the big bully on the block who does what he wants to because he is too big for anyone to tell him to stop. In school, this is the guy who would have gotten Exlax slipped into his milk. As a nation we are attacked by weak people we call terrorists. People say they are cowards because “they don’t fight fair.” WTF? The art of war: Use your enemy’s strength against him, use you weakness as strength. Duh.

    But thanks for the nice words anyway.

  4. Ill – I can certainly understand your frustration, especially being that you have served your country and put your ass on the line likely for some fucked up secret corrupt government agendas! HOWEVER… (and you knew that was coming) show me ONE government that ISN’T corrupt… I’d sure like to know who they are! I judge America based on the people of the country, not the assholes and wankers who happen to be in power. You are exactly right when you say that the U.S.A. has made some monumental mistakes all throughout history including up to present day. But being the most powerful country in the world, you have to expect to piss people off simply with the fact that you have more than other countries and have citizens who are free and liberated. There is nothing that would make some people out there happier than to see your country crumble. While it is important to remember the mistakes your country has made, it is also important to note the things your country does to advance our human species, our world, and the quality of human life… because there is nobody that has the means to do this better than the States. It is not even these things that make your country so great though, it is the people! The many faces that make up the diversity of America. There is no other country that we (Canadians) can identify with as much as we do with you. We are really no different, we just don’t have the incredible burden of being the most powerful and hated country in the world like you do.

    Fred: ROTFL “America… Fuck Yeah!” I sooooo almost wrote that into the post this morning!!! Great minds think alike!

  5. That dude just killed my buzz 🙂 That is not America. But you are a smart one, you already know that 🙂

    Don’t let the politics get in the way of the real America 🙂

  6. If I shook someone from a drug induced sleep and forced that person to face the fact that yes, that is America, that’s good. The American government now practices the same torture tactics that the Nazis did.

    That should not be America, but it is. As John McCain said, “this is not about the terrorists, this is about us.”

    Notice that the senators who should know, John McCain (POW), Chuch Hagel (Med. of Honor) and Lindsey Graham (JAG), all military men, are fighting to end torture by the U.S. Their ammendment passed in the senate 90-9. That shows that we have hope.

    Now our idiot president is threatening to veto the defense appropriations bill if the torture prohibition is not removed.

    We are destroying ourselves by allowing our government to reflect the worst in humanity and not demanding that it reflect the best. We must all stand up and yell “AMERICANS DON’T TORTURE PEOPLE, NO MATTER HOW BAD THOSE PEOPLE ARE.”

    I want to live in a country judged by the hightest standards, but the idiots running this country today want a race to the bottom.

    America has lost the moral high-ground. We are now war criminals. The next time someone wants to pretend that we are morally superior to others, they can just fuck off.

    Sorry for the additional buzz kill. I’ve been reading a lot about victims of the Nazis, and I see so many parallels to what is happening now in America, it scares me. Lingo please reference my post on Alfred Delp and the Shaking of the Advent. Americans need to be shaken from their slumber that tells them that we have a just, honorable government, because we don’t.

    Oh yeah, I forgot to remind you about one of America’s debts to Canada. In 1979 when the Iranian students took over the U.S. Embassy, several Embassy staff were off sight at the time. They sought refuge at the Canadian Embassy which provided them with false passports and other travel documents and got them out of Iran. I guess we kinda look alike to Iranians. The Canadians risked being taken hostage themselves if they were caught, but Canada is a country with moral fortitude. Thank You Canada.

  7. America… Seriously Ill, I’m with you on this one.

    Nothing gets ever done on the international scale out of generosity and love. Hell, it’s hardly done on the individual scale, why would you expect that of governements. The world is a business, and every country has its agenda. Global economy shows that very well, but this was also the case before, but it was more subtle. Only those informed know, as in the Nazi reference above.

    How come some know and others don’t? Oh well, ignorance is bliss, and governments efficiently maintain it with tools such as propaganda, censorship, religious values, and plain simple TV shows. That’s right: Romans said bread and games, and things haven’t changed much. Marx said religion is opium for the masses, and things haven’t changed much.

    You all would be very surprised as how the news are different when presented from a different perspective than the almighty divine CNN America bows to. TV deceives the masses, but no one cares much, for real research demands will and passion, and TV just demands you to sink in your couch with some nachos to nib at.

    I’m digressing. I will conclude by saying that information is power, so use it, damnit! Use the Net and get informed.

    Ill, I loved the reference about Sun Tzu. You’re right Lingo, great minds do think alike.

  8. Canada is not without corruption… We are not this shining beacon of democracy and justice that everyone thinks we are! There is just as much corruption going on here…

    Have you heard about the sponsorship scandal? That’s only one example, but here is an excerpt from an article about it:

    When Canada admits scandals, it often likes to think other democracies behave worse.

    But this scandal, tens of millions of untracked dollars gushing out to friends of government, is breathtakingly crude by advanced democratic standards.

    Washington’s Congress certainly has scandals, few recently as blatantly partisan. In the United States, the sponsorship abuses would have been hard to even imagine under the fierce glare of congressional committees and thousands of budget inspectors.

    Click here if you want to read the whole article.

    That is only one example of the corruption within our government that exists… There are many more examples. Canada is known for taking it up the ass from our corrupt government!

    I realize that the American Government is also corrupt (as are most), but i’m sorry, I don’t believe that the government speaks for the Nation.

    Hiddenson – you are right when you say that every country has a political agenda and that decisions are made based on that. However, you can’t just focus on the corruption that exists and not pay attention to the positive things that are happening as a result of U.S. decision making as well as the people who make up the Nation. That would not be a fair assessment and would just demonstrate innacuracy.

    I don’t believe America always makes great decisions, but I do believe that it is a great Nation with amazing people who are generous and insightful. I don’t believe that the idiots who are running the country at present are an accurate represnetation of America.

    Every government in the world is corrupt. That’s a fact!

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