Lingo Slinger

Shhh don’t tell… I have it all mapped out into 3 stages. Here’s a sneak peak for you:

Lingo’s Evil Plan ™!

My objective is simple: World Domination.

My motive is a little bit more complex: Love (Yes, it works)

Stage One
To begin my plan, I must first seduce a rock star. This will cause the world to slaughter a sacred calf to appease the gods, overwhelmed by my arrival. Who is this evil genius? Where did she come from? And why does she look so good in classic black?

Stage Two
Next, I must seize control of the internet. This will all be done from a abandoned church, a mysterious place of unrivaled dark glory. Upon seeing this, the world will gibber like madmen, as countless hordes of ninjas hasten to do my every bidding.

Stage Three
Finally, I must activate my corporate takeover, bringing about an end to sanity. My name shall become synonymous with fuzzy bunnies, and no man will ever again dare interrupt my sentences. Everyone will bow before my cunning intelligence, and the world will have no choice but to fall madly in love with me.

Yes yes… it’s all going to be beautiful. Just don’t FUCK with MY plan!! Go get your own!