Filed under: Culture, Evil, Life, Love & Relationships, My Life, Pop Cult. | Tags: domestic, gender roles, housework, june cleaver, stereotypes, undomestic, women
I used to be jealous of those people who had floors that you could eat from, perfect hand towels in the bathroom, and kitchens that made Martha Stewart look like a pig.
For a while my half-assed efforts left me feeling less than adequate when it came to being a “woman” and doing the whole “home making” thing, as I believed I should be. I would cringe at how easily my house became messy, how I still couldn’t get the floors gleaming, or how my living room always look cluttered.
“Some woman I am” I would say to myself on occasion.
Tupperware parties, baking, cleaning products, and PotPourri were never my thing. I never played house as a kid or learned good housekeeping tips from my mom. My siblings and I were horrible and never helped out, and my mom worked and tried to keep up a home and just couldn’t do it most days, which left her angry and tired.
Just because I have a lack of domesticity doesn’t mean I don’t try. There will be days where I crank the tunes and attack the house with the same enthusiasm as perfecting a painting, or days where I whip up some magic in the crock-pot. I AM CAPABLE… It’s just not natural for me. And I always choose spending time with my daughters, art, and creation before housework.
I don’t feel as guilty as I used to about my failing grade in housework. I actually find it sort of humourous. And after all, it’s not like we live like pigs, I just don’t have the same sense of perfection with my housework that I do with my work and art.
Women’s roles have changed drastically over the years and it’s absolutely ridiculous to expect us to behave in the same manner as June Cleaver. We are liberated, strong, opinionated, hard-working, creative people and are just as diverse as the types of jobs we take on.
Despite all of this, I find it funny that as women we still question ourselves if we aren’t perfect mothers, awesome cooks, professional cleaners, and loving wives and partners who stand in the kitchen with a smile and a pair of oven mitts.
Just by being women, we have the hardest job out there. Being a woman in today’s society is tough, so don’t beat yourself up if you have a dust bunny under your couch or a stink in your fridge.
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Its the stink under the couch and the dust bunny in the fridge that I’d be worried about!
Comment by MrCorey June 23, 2008 @ 9:43 amI am so with you on that. Working and keeping a house perfect was never me either. Clean yes but nothing wrong with a little mess.After all when living with other people and having actual lives we shouldn’t need to feel added pressure by “Measuring up” to anyone’s standards.
Comment by Lisa June 24, 2008 @ 4:26 pmI have friends who are so anal about their houses that they miss out sometimes.
Like you I will tackle the house in a swooping move. It’s a lot of work being a woman.
One time I was grocery shopping around Christmas time and was unloading groceries into the car and a woman next to me was doing the same and I turned to her and said “I need a Wife”.
I gave her a good laugh. I guess she right home and told her husband what I said.
(For a while my half-assed efforts left me feeling less than adequate when it came to being a “woman” and doing the whole “home making” thing, as I believed I should be. I would cringe at how easily my house became messy, how I still couldn’t get the floors gleaming, or how my living room always look cluttered. )
Are we sisters lingo?? Holy shit did I need to read this tonight!! I try so hard to be “that stereotype bitch woman” you decribed. It is so damn tough. I have the same problem with guilt for not having shit perfect! Wow I really needed to read this post. THANK YOU!!
You are right on with what you posted. Men need to read this shit! Especially husbands!
Comment by justordinary June 26, 2008 @ 10:41 pmLisa: That’s hillarious. i think I need a wife too. Hey I know… why don’t we all become lesbians!
JO: I know, we are sooooo alike. I am glad this post helped in some small way. Women are too pressured these days, it’s not fair.
I hate when men think we should act like Betty Crockers, it’s like fuck off… we bear children, we work, we obsess over our health and weight, we raise children, we keep a house, we try to keep our sanity and it AIN’T EASY!
GIRL POWER Woooo Hooo!
Comment by lingoslinger June 27, 2008 @ 10:48 amSorry men… you’re good too (some of you) but you gotta give props to the ladies!
MrCorey: Dust bunnies in the fridge would definitely be a cause for alarm, but then for some women, it might be a weight loss tactic.
Comment by lingoslinger June 27, 2008 @ 10:49 amLesbians?? AWESOME!!!
Comment by steve June 27, 2008 @ 4:01 pmLesbians,lol! I think it’s about the chores more than the sex!
Comment by Lisa June 30, 2008 @ 8:23 amI figure a house is in good shape as long as it isn’t the dust bunnies causing the stink in the fridge.
Comment by Omnipotent Poobah June 30, 2008 @ 9:56 amSteve I knew you’d be in for some lesbo action… LOL. Ahh who isn’t?!
Lisa: If only men would “get that”… they’d be having a lot more sex.
Poobah: Homemakers Digest has strong opinions about rotting carcasses. I’m impartial to it.
Comment by lingoslinger July 2, 2008 @ 12:04 pm